CELEBRATE your CHILDREN

Yesterday I was reflecting on all the Facebook posts I have been seeing from people I grew up with. Posts showcasing the many accomplishments of their children. I beamed with pride for them and felt so happy that they are raising great children. And then I began to wonder about the ones I haven't seen. Are they not on Facebook? Do they not like to post personal stories? Are their children not high flyers? And that last question stuck with me...how do the parents of the students who aren't coming first in class or in sports feel when they see the posts of their peers and their peers' children? Do they feel bad? Do they feel embarrassed? And I imagined that maybe there is at least a tinge of something opposite to a warm and fuzzy feeling. So I decided I want to encourage the parents of the children who are not first in anything.

Here's the thing, EVERYBODY is good at SOMETHING. Yet, because of how our educational system is set up, what your child is good at may not get a prize or an award. As the parent, a part of your job is to CELEBRATE what's good about your child, even if nobody else does. Is your child obedient, neat, honest, mannerly, energetic, affectionate, friendly, an avid reader? CELEBRATE that! Does your child finish what he/she starts? CELEBRATE that! Does your child love the Lord Jesus? CELEBRATE that!

As I continued in my thoughts, I remembered the funerals I have attended and the tributes I read and heard from the children and grand children of the deceased. The common thread in those tributes was the children talking about the way their mother or father believed in them, encouraged them, made them feel special no matter what. I have yet to hear anyone say that their parent bought them the latest toys or name brand clothes and put them in a mansion. It was the way they encouraged them to be the best person, the best at what they put their minds to, that stood out to them.

Therefore, I encourage you with this: If you are a parent of a school age child reading this right now, no matter your child's GPA, find at least ONE thing your child does well and CELEBRATE it. It doesn't have to be shared on social media, but make sure your child knows that you see his/her strength and you are excited and pleased about it. And also let your children know that you love them, just as they are. No matter the circumstances of their birth, or your current struggles, accept and love your children and let them know that with your words and actions.

In my line of work I have met students with great courage, team spirit, perseverance, strength in the face of adversity, outside the box thinking, dramatic ability, artistic intelligence, etc. I love to see students excel and I am proud of the high flyers. However, I am even prouder when I see the light bulb come on and a student fights his/her way from not meeting the mark to surpassing it. I love hearing teachers say, "wow, this student sure made a come around." We all want our children to do well. But let's keep in mind that "well" is relative. Everyone will not be a straight A student, everyone cannot finish first, but everyone can do their best. Encourage your children to do their best and then reward them when they do their best. [s/n: please STOP rewarding children for doing NOTHING. You're creating lazy individuals who feel entitled to get something for nothing.]

Parents, you can boost your child's self-esteem by affirming his/her strengths and helping to navigate the challenging areas. You've been blessed with a gift and how you treat that gift, makes a huge difference in your child's life and in our communities. Please, CELEBRATE your CHILDREN!